NO WORD FROM EILEEN

Eileen never got back to me. The call never came. I waited 48 hours hoping that she would ring to confirm what I thought was a deal to upgrade my Vodafone account - but not a word. She remains the distant voice in some anonymous call centre, part of an 'experienced sales team' - Vodafone's description not mine - talking to others and trying to do deals that would squeeze just a bit more money out of punter's pockets.

It was a fleeting affair that came to nothing. I finally realised that her acceptance of my request for a £10 a month fixed term contract and a new Nokia 6210 mobile phone was an upgrade too far. She did say that it had to be agreed by her supervisor - and I now suspect the answer was no. I hope Eileen didn't lose her job because of me!

After a couple of days I tried to make contact with Eileen but she was out there somewhere and couldn't be located when I called Vodafone. Eileen didn't answer. Instead it was .. "Hello, my name is John." He didn't seem to know who she was - or was it Vodafone policy to say that and then quickly move on to make sure they kept my custom by offering a new deal. They didn't want to lose me to Orange or T.Mobile or anyone else.

As you would expect, John was polite, chatty and very business-like. Yes he could give me a very good deal although it wasn't as good as Eileen's offer. The basic price had risen to £20 but at least it included a free Nokia 6210. He provided all the facts and figures that were obviously there on the screen in front of him and was not slow to point out that I would be saving a few pounds each month. I listened but decided not to ask about a Blackberry. He chatted on and then I mentioned Eileen.

Her deal was much better than what he was offering - and he knew it. The tone of the conversation changed and very soon we were discussing figures that were below his offer and much closer to Eileen's. I was now in the driving seat and he knew that it would be pointless to argue his case any longer. We began to chat about issues beyond our current business deal although I suspect he was also crunching the numbers on his screen at the same time just to make sure he didn't have to climb down any further and 'talk to his supervisor'.

We parted on very amicable terms. Vodafone had signed me up for another 24 months and I was getting two new Nokia handsets - one for me, the other for Pat. The monthly charge had been reduced by £20 altogether and now I await the Royal Mail special delivery and that moment when some shiny new technology will be unwrapped and I turn to page one of the booklet which says 'How to get the best out of your new Nokia 6210'. Now that could demand a lot of concentration.

Thanks Eileen. I won't be talking to you again. I didn't quite get the deal you suggested but Vodafone should be happy. I am.